NB: So for some reason scheduled posts stopped working, meaning the last three entries didn’t post at all. Just gonna keep going as normal because now I have a three-day backlog. Here’s Monday’s.
“Get back in the kitchen and make me a sandwich,” he says.
I sigh exasperatedly, heading into the kitchen. I stand in front of the counter, palms upturned to the heavens, eyes pitch-black as I invoke the darkest magicks to help me with this task.
There is a strangled sound of alarm as he realises that he is suddenly smaller and more rectangular. His skin is shedding golden-brown crumbs, his tongue is now a slice of wafer-thin ham, and where he once had hair there is now a small handful of organic lettuce.
I have made him a sandwich.
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