How To Write A Blog Post (A Foolproof Guide in 29 Easy Steps)

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  1. Have an idea.
  2. Get distracted and eventually forget idea.
  3. Remember idea at thoroughly inappropriate moment.
  4. Write down idea on scrap of paper in the form of mostly illegible notes.
  5. Promptly lose scrap of paper.
  6. Find scrap of paper some time later, completely by accident.
  7. Realise you only remember what half of it means and curse illegibility of own handwriting.
  8. Draw up a “proper plan”.
  9. Spend far too much time drawing up “proper plan”.
  10. FINALLY sit down to write blog post.
  11. Deliberate for much too long over title.
  12. Write title.
  13. Mess with tags and url so that you don’t have to start writing.
  14. Deliberate for much too long over first line.
  15. Write first line.
  16. Rewrite first line.
  17. Repeat step 14 ad nauseum and finally decide to keep original first line.
  18. Write first few paragraphs and feel proud of own progress.
  19. Read back work so far.
  20. Delete work so far.
  21. Re-write first few paragraphs.
  22. Decide it still sucks, but it’s better this time around.
  23. Repeat steps 18 to 22 with next few paragraphs.
  24. Look up from laptop and realise it is significantly darker than it was when you started.
  25. Look at clock and realise it is 1 am.
  26. Hurriedly write conclusion to blog post.
  27. Re-write conclusion to blog post.
  28. Decide it could be better, but it’s 1.30am and you would like to sleep now.
  29. Click “Publish”.

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